


Hamilton meets Heathers

by LocalTrashCanTM



Category: Hamilton - Fandom, Heathers
Genre: Hamilton - Freeform, Heathers - Freeform, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-14
Updated: 2018-10-01
Packaged: 2019-03-18 01:16:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13671213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LocalTrashCanTM/pseuds/LocalTrashCanTM
Summary: heathers but with the hamilton cast.





	1. Introduction

Alexander Hamilton- 17. Yearns to be both cool and kind, but doesn't yet know how to be both at the same time. Fierce sense of right and wrong, keen sense of ironic humor. Thinks she'san old soul, but she's still innocent enough to be blindsided by love or shockedby cruelty.

John "Jackie'' Laurens- 17.Darkly charismatic, compelling, attractive. Charming on the outside, damaged on the inside. Keen smarts,savage wit.

Thomas Jefferson- 17. The richest, honest, cruelest girl in town. Relishes power and wields it without fear, patience, or mercy.

James Madison-17. Beautiful, innocent,stupid.Can be mean on command if Heather Chandler orders it, but actually quite vulnerable and fearful.

Aaron Burr-17. The whipped beta dog of the three Heathers. Deeply insecure. When she finally becomes Queen Bee, she wields power like a bulldozer.

Eliza Schuyler- 17. Nicknamed Martha Dumptruck.-the opposite of confident and popular. Huge and beautiful soul,optimistic even in the face of rejection.

Hercules Mulligan- 17, Linebacker. Big, insensitive to the feelings of others,ruled by appetites.

Marquis de Lafayette- 17. Quarterback and captain. Chiseled, rude. entitled,cocky. He's the brains in the friendship with Hercules.

Hercules's Dad (King George the third)- 45. Former football player turned suburban dad, he has never outgrown his high school glory days. Hates weakness, but capable of soul searching when tragedy strikes.

Big Bud Laurens (George Eacker)- 40. Jackie's single dad. Big jolly personality that barely conceals the enormous rage bubbling just below the surface. Quite possibly a serial bomber.

Coach ripper (Charles Lee.)- 45. Lee, man's man; quick to defend his players.

Ms.Schyuler (Angelica as Ms.Fleming)- 42. No relation to Eliza. :Aging hippie teacher, still yearning for the day the Age of Aquarius reaches Ohio. Resentful of today's enlitled youth,protective of the underdogs.Despite a penchant for self-promotion,genuinelycares about the students in her charge.

Alexander's mom (maria reynolds)- 48. easygoing,distant, yet capable of laying down the law.

Alexander's dad (James Reynolds)- 49. Easy going and distant.

Lafayette's dad (Samuel Seabury)- 45. Straight-laced, very conservative, also former football player.A simple guy, not book smart, you'd be happy to share a beer with him.

Principal Washington- 50. Rumpled, burned out, hates conflict.


	2. Scene one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took me soooo long to do because the website I used to look at the script ended up costing money so it took me forever for find a new one. Plus I wanted to work on other stores. So enjoy chapter 2. I have no idea if I’m gonna continue this or not so ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

Alexander's P.O.V  
Finally, after the first three hellish periods, it was lunch. The bell had rung, and students began to swarm to the cafeteria to get their prison food. I pull out my diary and put on my monocle to begin writing. September 1, 1989.Dear Diary: I made my way to the cafeteria, and looked around the halls at my fellow delinquents. I think I'm a good person. You know, I think there's good in everyone. But here we are, first day of senior year. I look around at these kids I've known all my life and I ask myself, what happened? "FREAK! SLUT!BURNOUT! BUG-EYES!POSER! LARD-ASS!" I watched in dismay as my peers hurled insults and punches at each other. We were so tiny. Happy and shiny.Playing tag and getting chased. "FREAK! SLUT! LOSER! SHORT BUS!" I continued to watch the heathens harass each other. I kept writing down how things used today before everyone turned into assholes. Singing and clapping. Laughing and napping. Baking cookies, eating paste. "BULL-DYKE! STUCK-UP! HUNCHBACK!" Then we got bigger. That was the trigger like the Huns invading Rome- Suddenly I was shoved over by two students. I quickly apologize before continuing my writing. Welcome to my school.This ain't no high school; this is the Thunder-dome. Hold your breath and count the days, we're graduating soon. I watched as two kids shove another screaming,"WHITE TRASH!" College will be paradise if I'm not dead by June. I look around at all these students and begin to imagine them all back to when we were kids. But I know, I know, life can be beautiful. I pray I pray for a better way. If we changed back then, we could change again. We can be beautiful... I witness a stupid preppy stud shove a hipster nerd down. I heard him say ow out loud. "Just not today," I go over to the hipster. "Hey, are you ok?" The hipster got up and proceeded to scream at me,"Get away, nerd!" I sigh and get into the lunch line. I continue to hear the hurling of insults. "FREAK! SLUT! CRIPPLE! HOMO! HOMO! HOMO!" I pull out my diary and start writing again. Things will get better soon as my letter comes from Harvard, Duke, or Brown. Wake from this coma, take my diploma, then I can blow this town. Dream of ivy-covered walls and smokey french cafes. I didn't notice Hercules talking to his teammate whispering the words,"Watch this." to him. Fight the urge to strike and set this dump ablaze. Just when I finished writing, Hercules smacked my lunch tray from my hands saying a sarcastic,"Ooops." "Hercules Mulligan." I began to think," Third year as linebacker. And eighth year of smacking lunch trays and being a huge dick!" As if he could read my mind he asked,"What did you say to me, skank?" I quickly shrunk back and answered with the word nothing. He makes the "I've got my eyes on you motion" and walks away. As I wrote, I could hear the faint sound of people singing along to what I wrote. I quickly shook my head and kept writing. But I know, I know... "I know, I know..." Life can be beautiful.. "Beautiful" I pray, I pray... "I pray, I pray," For a better way... "For a better way" We were kind before; "Oooh..."We can be kind once more.. "Oooh..."We can be beautiful..."Oooh... Beautiful..." I felt someone touch my shoulder so I turned around screaming,"AGH!... Hey Eliza," "Hey." "Eliza Schuyler. My best friend since diapers." "We on for movie night?" She asked. I smiled responding,"Yeah, you're on Jiffy Pop detail." "I rented "The Princess Bride.'" She said clapping her hands together. "Ho-ho-ho, again?" I asked laughing slightly. "Wait, don't you have it memorized by now?" I asked. "What can I say?" she said with a dreamy look on her face,"I'm a sucker for a happy ending." That's when Lafayette saw his opportunity to be an ass. "Eliza Dumptruck! Wide load Honnnnnk!" He said as he smacked Eliza's lunch tray with Hercules tailing behind him. "Marquis de Lafayette.Quarterback. He is the smartest guy on the football team. Which is kind of like being the tallest dwarf." I was furious that Lafayette did that, so I said,"Hey! Pick that up right now." Lafayette stopped laughing and turned towards me. "I'm sorry, are you actually talking to moi?" Just then, his wingman Hercules joined in. "My buddy Laf asked you a question." I looked around at everyone. They were all watching, some even thankful it wasn't them. I took a deep breathe before continuing. "What gives you the right to pick on my friend?Look at you, you're a high school has-been waiting to happen. A future gas-station attendant." He smiled coldly before pointing to my chin."You got a zit right there." All the students laughed as he pushed me out of his way and walked away. I put my pen back to my diary and started writing. Dear Diary: Why? I looked around to see people asking the same question. "Why do they hate me?" I heard one boy say as he was pushed around. As a girl was thrown to the girl asked,"Why don't I fight back?" I looked over to Laf to hear him say,"Why do I act like such a creep?" I looked over at Eliza gazing over at Herc listening to her mumble the question,"Why won't he date me?" I followed her gaze to watch Herc hit an unsuspecting freshman. He then asked,"Why did I hit him?" I heard a multitude of students ask the question,"Why do I cry myself to sleep?" I then write down the word Why? in my diary again. It was like I was hearing the whole school say what I heard next,"Somebody hug me. Somebody fix me. Somebody save me. Send me a sign, God. Get me some cold beer. Something to live for..." It was then the cafeteria doors slammed open and everyone acknowledged the presence on the Southern MotherFucken Democratic-Republicans. "Oh-oh, Thomas, James, and Aaron." The student body basically sang. I began to write in my diary again. And then there's the SMFDR. They float above it all. The student body continued,"I love Thomas, James, and Aaron. I hate Thomas, James, and Aaron." I continued writing in my diary when the first person of the SMFDR sat down. James Madison, head cheerleader. His dad is loaded, he sells engagement rings. The student body continued,"I want Thomas, James, and Aaron." I watch the next member sit down and wrote about them too. Aaron Burr, runs the yearbook. No discernable personality, but his mom did pay for implants. "Hair implants that is," I thought. "I need Thomas, James, and Aaron." The final and most important member finally sat down and I continued writing. And Thomas Jefferson, the almighty. He is a mythic bitch. They're solid Teflon, never bothered, never harassed. I would give anything to be like that. I began to hear the whispers of the students. I heard one boy say," I'd like to be their boyfriend." While the entire student body basically sang in response,"That would be beautiful." I heard another girl say,"If I sat at their table, guys would notice me." Once again the student body sang in response,"So beautiful." I heard Eliza say," I'd like them to be nicer." I nodded in agreement when the students still continued to sing in response,"That would be beautiful." I heard one more boy but highly regretted it as he said," I'd like to kidnap a Heather and photograph her naked in an abandoned warehouse and leave her tied up for the rats." The bell then rang as I followed the SFMDR to the bathroom. I watched as Burr went straight into a stall and started to throw up while the other two looked in the mirrors. As the sounds of Burr hurling continued, Thomas sneered and said,"Grow up, Aaron. Bulimia is so '87." I watched as Aaron left the stall and stood next to Thomas, as he continued to fix his hair. "Thomas, I need a mint."He said. Thomas took a roll of breath mints from his purse and handed it to Aaron. James looked over to Aaron then said,"What you need, Aaron, is to see a doctor." Aaron responded,"I hate my doctor. He smells like Drakkar Noir." I watched as Aaron's face slowly got green and watched as he went back into the stall to throw up. I heard footsteps coming down the hall, so I quickly made myself as small as possible. I watched as Ms.Schuyler entered the boys bathroom. "Is she allowed to do that?" I thought. "Ah, Thomas and James," the sound of Aaron vomiting interrupted her. "...And Aaron," she continued. "Perhaps you didn't hear the bell over all the vomiting. You're late for class." Hearing that, I quickly put on my monocle, which I had previously taken off, and started to forge a hall pass. "Aaron wasn't feeling well. We're helping him," Thomas argued. "Not without a hall pass you're not. A week's detention." Ms.Schuyler said smirking. "Actually, Ms. Schuyler," I interrupted,"all four of us are out on a hall pass. Yearbook committee." I handed Ms.Schuyler the hall pass.Ms. Schuyler sourly looked at the pass while the SMFDR looked at it puzzled. "I see you're all listed. Hurry up and get where you're going." Ms.Schuyler then left. Thomas grabbed the pass from me and studied it. "This is an excellent forgery," Thomas said,"Who are you?" I cheerfully extended my hand only for Thomas to ignore the gesture. "Alexander Hamilton, I crave a boon," I answered. Thomas looked at me and asked annoyed,"What boon?" "Let me sit at your table at lunch. Just once. No talking necessary. If people think you guys tolerate me, they'll leave me alone." Thomas laughed as if he was tickled with my boldness. I continued,"Before you answer, I also do report cards, permission slips, and absence notes." "How about prescriptions?" Aaron asked before Thomas told him to shut up in which then he apologized. Thomas then brushed back the hair in my face and looked at me as if he was inspecting me. "Hmm," Thomas started,"For a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure." "And a symmetrical face," James added,"If I took a meat cleaver down the center of your skull, I'd have matching halves. That's very important." "Of course, you could stand to lose," Aaron started before he threw up a little in his mouth and swallowed.  
"-a few pounds." "And ya know,ya know, ya know?" Thomas sang while titling my chin. "This could be beautiful. Mascara, maybe some lip gloss... and we're on our way. Get this girl some blush and James,I need your blush, let's make him beautiful..." "Let's make him beautiful..." Aaron sang. "Let's make him beautiful..." James continued. "Make him beautiful..." Thomas finished. "Okay?" "Okay!" I answered excitedly as we left the restroom. 

Next day at lunch.

I watched as Lafayette and Hercules entered the cafeteria and push down a geek. "Out of my way, geek!" Lafayette yelled at the geek before the geek responded,"I don't want trouble." Then of soured Hercules had to jump in,"You're gonna die at 3pm!" Hercules then shoves the geek I to a republicanette and a new wave girl. "Don't you dare touch me! Get away pervert!" They said in unison to the geek. "What'd I ever do to them?" He asked bewildered and scared. In unison, the faculty and students said "WHO COULD SURVIVE THIS? I CANT ESCAPE THIS! I THINK IM DYING!" Ms.Schuyler looked outside the cafeteria and caught my eye. We held eye contact before she said,"Who's that with the SMFDR?" We entered the cafeteria ,me standing behind the three,yet it seemed like they all looked at me saying "Whoa." They continued to sing "Aaron, James, and Thomas." The new wave pointed at me and said,"And... someone!" The students and faculty continued,"Aaron, James, and Thomas." Ms.Schuyler, Coach Ripper, and Principal Washington, said "And a babe." "That's fucking weird..." I thought. However everyone continued,"Aaron, James, and Thomas." I locked eyes with Eliza, and she immediately recognized me. "Alexander?" She asked. As soon as she said my name, the entire cafeteria sang "Alexander? Alexander! Alexander!!" Then the SMFDR lattes revealing me. Having everyone look at me with such admiration and respect I stood taller and belted,"AND YOU KNOW," the students and faculty joined,"OH!" "YA KNOW, YA KNOW... LIFE CAN BE BEAUTIFUL." "AH! BEAUTIFUL!" "YOU HOPE, YOU DREAM," "OH!" "YOU PRAY," "AH!"  "AND YOU GET YOUR WAY!" "ASK ME HOW IT FEELS" "BEAUTIFUL!" "LOOKING LIKE" "OO!" "HELL ON WHEELS..." "OH! AH!" "MY GOD, IT'S BEAUTIFUL!" "BEAUTIFUL!" "I MIGHT BE BEAUTIFUL!" "BEAUTIFUL!" "AND WHEN YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL..." "AH!" "IT'S A BEAUTIFUL FRICKIN' DAY!" "AARON! JAMES! THOMAS! ALEXANDER!" "HEY!" "AARON! JAMES! THOMAS! ALEXANDER! ALEXANDER!" I joined in the chanting of my near the end. "ALEXANDER! ALEXANDER! ALEXANDER!"


End file.
